Snapple you win nothing

"Every time I talk to a fancy journalist and they ask what I do in my free time my scumbag brain goes ' say masturbate, it'll be hilarious '." Anna Kendrick.
"Nothing can burst your fatherly bubble faster than hearing your daughter come home from a date and saying: ' Some nights I don't know why I even bother to wear panties '." Dave Henry.If he's torrenting it, then using the *AA's logic, he's killing the child porn industry!" "I wonder if sex in heaven is considered necrophilia." "Necrophilia: better late than never." "Yeah, I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality and sadism, but then I realized I was."An erection is like the Theory of Relativity the more you think about it, the harder it gets." "I combined my penis with calculus, thinking that would make it incredibly hard. Brad Simanek."I got an erection during a prostrate examination; it was then that he realised I wasnt a doctor." "When you think about it, there is really a fine line between being a proctologist and just being a perverted ass-freak."Love is the delightful interval between meeting a beautiful girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock.".A: There's twenty of them." "Sometimes I threaten to black male my sister." "I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is; I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat."."The penis-enlarging pills my boyfriend bought online must be working."I think masturbation is wrong and dirty.Legally." Jenn McNanna."We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation." Lilly Tomlin.
I think maybe my wife's negative thoughts are interfering." Maurizio Mariotti.' How the hell do I know?It makes much more sense to unload a gun than to shoot at a bulletproof vest." "Until that day when women, and only women, shall determine which American males must, by law, have vasectomies, then and only then will you or any man have the."If masturbation makes you deaf, fellatio makes you mute, at least until you finish." "Never masturbate faster than your guardian angel can fly." Mike MacDonald."The angle of the dangle is equally proportional to the heat of the meat provided that the urge to surge remains constant." "A faery gave me a wish: I could either have a perfect memory or a huge penis."If God had meant us to have group sex, he'd have given us more organs." Malcolm Bradbury.